I was looking around for pictures of alaias, and I came across a Spanish wine called "Alaia." I have never had it, so don't know what it tastes like, but it's fairly inexpensive, so I imagine it is one of those earthy red table wines for which the Iberian peninsula is famous.
Anyhow, check out the label below. Obviously a slider doing the la-la. And, if you drink enough of this stuff, I am sure you can la-la without a board.
I don't condone violence, but do hate it when SUP people take over a peak. Here is a pretty damn good alaia surfer taking matters into his own hands to help a bro who got snaked by a SUP at Rincon.